This week’s parasha, Chukkat, informs us of the death of Moshe’s brother Aharon, the first Kohen. The text reads …all the house of Israel wailed over Aharon for 30 days (Numbers 20:29). This verse is the origin of the mourning practice called Shloshim (literally ‘thirty'). The obligation to mourn falls upon family members of the following relations: parent, child, sibling and spouse. That is, if one’s relation to a family member is any of these categories then that person is obligated to follow the laws of Jewish mourning. Shiva (‘seven’) are the days that a mourner abstains from working, conjugal relations, shaving one’s beard or getting a haircut, leaving the shiva house unnecessarily, bathing for pleasure. Shloshim is an eased extension of the mourning period. During this time, one returns to work but desists from attending public forms of merriment (live music, theater, cinema, parties, and weddings). Some choose to extend the shaving restriction as a way of publicly expressing one’s mournfulness – during shiva, only those who visited saw the unshaven status of the mourner. Furthermore, the mourner’s obligation to recite kaddish ends at the conclusion of these thirty days. Finally, the mitzvah of kibud Av v’Em (honoring one’s parents) extends the practices of Shloshim to twelve months for offspring of the deceased.
